Sunday, July 31, 2011

Every day is awkward.

If I didn't love the title of my blog so much,
I'd rename it

EVERY DAY IS AWKWARD.


Brice at work told me this was the motto of his mission,
and now it's the new motto of my life.


Cause when I think about it,
a lot of what terrifies me
and keeps me from living life and being my best
is fear of awkwardness
or being perceived as awkward.

But if you assume and anticipate and accept awkwardness,

LIFE IS A LOT LESS PAINFUL.

Cause it's not the end of the world.

An awkward situation doesn't make you a bad person,
and an awkward delivery doesn't cancel out the love or friendship you feel for someone.


Being super awkward, I've had a lot of occasion to implement this motto recently.

Like when you volunteer at the MTC and one of the missionaries teaching you won't talk.


Like when you have no plans on Friday night so you do laundry.


Like when you stop to say hi to someone and then you just stand there with nothing more to say.


Like when you care too much about telling a story that doesn't turn out to be funny.


Like when you're a little too obvious around a guy you like.


Like when you try to take a picture but then there's a bug flying in front of your face.


Like when you accidentally get really excited about telling some guys you recently met about the boy you liked in high school.


Like when you accidentally flip out in front of people who don't know you that well.


Like when your bishop jokes about setting up you and the guy standing next to you.
But you've already gone out once.


Like when you're at Rock Canyon Park and you really want to run around singing "The Hillllllls are Alive!" So you do.
And then the other people at the park laugh really loud and then imitate you.


Can you tell that I could go on forever?




But it's okay. Cause every day is awkward.

3 comments:

  1. "well my home teacher died."

    it's okay girl. We can be awkward together. Though, you're more witty/clever than awkward. It's the OTHER people who are awkward.

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